Velocijakked: Episode 1

Segment 1: CM Punk promo in-ring (with Paul Heyman). Punk declares once again that since he's defeated all opposition to his WWE Championship reign he is clearly the Best in the World and says there's only one man who can officially declare that. He calls out Mr McMahon. Vince says that while Punk's 343-day reign is very impressive, it's not the longest reign in recent WWE history, and he needs to defeat one man to gain that distinction. John Cena out. Punk throws a fit, saying "NO NO NO, I ALREADY BEAT HIM! THIS IS STUPID!" Cena says that he agrees, Punk's already beaten him. But he hasn't beaten his record, and it's only fair that Cena is the one to get that opportunity. Punk says "screw that" and leaves. Vince shrugs and says that he's got other things to deal with - Paul Heyman, because they're the new commentary team on Velocijakked!

Segment 2: CM Punk backstage segment. Ace reporter Camacho asks him why he's leaving and Punk says, "who the hell are you?" Punk drives off.

Segment 3: Zack Ryder promo in-ring. Ryder says that since there's only one championship on Velocijakked, his Internet Championship makes him the second-Best in the World! He says he'll take on all comers and declares an open challenge for his title. No-one comes out. A tumbleweed blows across the ring, and Zack eventually leaves after asking, "Are You Serious, Bro?"

Segment 4: Rey Mysterio and Sin Cara vs Drew McIntyre and Jinder Mahal of 3MB. 3MB come out first and are about to perform when the faces come out. Rey and Sin Cara win despite some botches. As they celebrate, the Usos viciously attack them from behind. They grab a table and Jimmy splashes Sin Cara through it. Jey grabs a mic and says that he and Jimmy are sick of tag teams that aren't even real teams being apart of this division. They're brothers, which is a real relationship! What do Rey and Sin Cara have in common? Masks? Who cares about masks? They leave both faces laying.

Segment 5: Ace reporter Camacho out-of-arena segment. He's driving the low-rider bike around trying to find where CM Punk went. He is hit by a car and flies off the side of the road.

Segment 6: Heath Slater vs Yoshi Tatsu. Slater mostly dominates and Slateroo, 123 Slater over.

Segment 7: 3MB backstage segment. Heath Slater is telling Drew and Jinder that it's OK that they lost, because they're a real three man band, baby! He says that they're like Nirvana - and they didn't have success straight away either! All three men agree and do their dance.

Segment 8: Tyson Kidd vs Ezekiel Jackson. Kidd puts up a good fight but eventually Zeke's strength proves the difference. Zeke over.

Segment 9: William Regal and Tyson Kidd backstage segment. Regal says that he was impressed how Kidd put up a good fight against that monstrosity of a man in Zeke. Regal says he knows the secret that would help Kidd could beat Zeke next time they fought. Kidd says "what do you know, old man?" and walks off.

Segment 10: Ted DiBiase Jr. vs JTG. DiBiase over quite easily.

Segment 11: CM Punk backstage segment. He re-enters the arena and gets out of his car with a smug smile on his face. Ace reporter Camacho tries to ask why but falls over and can't get up.

Segment 12: CM Punk promo in-ring. He calls out Cena. Punk explains to Cena that by the time Survivor Series comes around, he will be behind just three men for the longest reign in the past 25 years of the WWE Championship. One of the greatest superstars of all-time, Randy Savage. An over-hyped bodybuilder. And Hulk Hogan. Punk says that he has no reason to give Cena another chance at his title - and his title reign - and says that he's even overcoming the unfair treatment he's receiving from Mr McMahon. But Punk says that he's willing to on one condition. Cena jokes around saying "what's the catch, I've gotta kiss your butt? Whatever it is, I'll do it!" Punk says that if Punk wins at Survivor Series, John Cena can never have another match for the WWE Championship. Punk leaves and walks up the ramp. Cena says, "Wait, Punk! ...I'll do it."